Ah, The Randomness
by Fluffies-Penguin
Summary: The gang gets drunk! beware, a bit OCness,(because of drunkeness) AU, and much much more!(it's rated, beware!)
1. It's All So Sad

: out loud

#actions#

_thoughts_

KP: Hello! My name is KaratePenguin, or Miaa if you want to get technical. (Please don't) I love Inu-chan!

FM: Hideho Everyone! My name is FluffysMaiden and (judging by the name) I LOVE FLUFFY-SAMA!!!!!!!!! (But then again who doesn't?) #big smile#

KP: mumbles I don't… Anyways…. Beware, randomness shall occur! We made this up while feeling the effects of boredom and sleepiness. #yawns and absentmindedly squeezes her Inuyasha plushie#

FM: Yes… oh what randomness shall occur…. hmm…yes…. You have been WARNED!!!! #menial laughter# ;;

KP: #stares at FluffysMaiden# yes…. #more maniacal laughter is heard# FM! I thought I told you to get rid of the maniacal laughter CD!

FM: #quickly stops maniacal laughter CD and chucks it out the window# Umm… what CD KP? I have no clue what you're talking about… #sweat drop# ;;

KP: Anyways, this really isn't about maniacal laughter. #pets Inu plushie#

FM: Yes that's true… #runs to grab Sesshy plushie#

KP: We are really trying to tell you of when my Inuyasha plushie came to life! #cuddles the enchanting cuteness of the plushie#

FM: #runs back with Sesshy plushie# WE ARE? #thinks for a moment# OH YEAH! When did this happen again?

KP: It was about 2 years ago…. #wink wink#

You see, we've had our plushies for as long as we can remember.

FM: Which was pretty long ago. #pets Sesshy plushie affectionately# So we were at my house sitting in the basement and…

Hey! I wish Sesshomaru were here! #looks upwards# CAN I CAN I PLEASE?!?!?!?

KP: What are you talking about? #watches while holding the Inuyasha plushie, then begins to drift away in thought# _What if Inuyasha were real? What if he were here with me? What if… #_falls asleep#

FM: #stops jumping# Um, KP? #pokes KP# KP? KP? #continues to poke KP#

KP: #KaratePenguin is completely asleep, and starts talking# …blender …ketchup… moist pickles… stay away from the blender… we gotta catch it…

FM: #sweat drop# Oh no… #rolls her eyes and directs her attention to Sesshy Plushie# Fluffy-sama, she's having the blender dream again. #then slowly falls asleep#

------When We Wake Up ------

KP: #slowly opens her eyes to the sound of a hyperactive 15 year old# Wa…What? #she feels around for her plushie, but it has disappeared# …What the?

Kagome: Finally you're awake KaratePenguin! I was afraid you were going to sleep through the whole party!

KP: Party…? #looks around the room to find she's at the Huragashi House, now decorated for a party. FluffysMaiden is sleeping on top of a flowery pink tablecloth#

Kagome: Yay! Everyone should be here soon!

FM: #slowly awakens to Kagome's voice# Huh? #shakes her head and looks around, then for her plushie# What! Where'd you go? Fluffy-sama! Where are you???

Kagome: #watches in confusion as FM frantically searches# Um…FluffysMaiden? What are you doing? And whose Fluffy-sama?

FM: #freezes# What… did… you… say? #turns around with flames in her eyes# You did not just ask who… wait a minute… #looks around, noticing where they are# Where… am I? #blank look#

KP: #whispers who cares# just play along!

Door: Ding Dong!

KP: Wow! The door speaks!

Door: yes, and I serve iced tea! #hands her a glass of iced tea#

KP: Thanks! #dumps it into the nearest plant, and then watches it's quick and painful death#

Voice: Hello?! Do you realize someone is here?!

FM: #goes and opens the door# OMG please no #Kagome's three friends are standing at the door#

FM: #standing in front of the girls with a 'please go away' look#

Eri: Uh, FluffysMaiden…are you going to let us in anytime soon?

FM: #looks over to KP# Do I have to?

KP: NO!! #runs to the door and slams it in their faces. Glasses of iced tea are heard clashing into the ground#

Kagome: #stares#

Door: Ow…

KP: Well, it was for the better.

Kagome: Yeah, I suppose. #walks into her kitchen#

KP: #eyes enlarge anime style# Are you getting milk?! Can I have some milk? I love milk! Do you want some milk? Milk milk milk… #hyper freaking as she follows Kagome into the kitchen#

Door: Ding Dong!

FM: Shut up!

Door: Ding Dong!

FM: Do you want to die or something? #threatening glare#

Door: Ding Dong! sweat drop I'm sorry! Ding Dong! It's not Ding Dong! My fault!

FM: Oh, okay. Sorry about that. #answers the door, to find the three friends still there# GO AWAY! I WILL SICK FLUFFY-SAMA ON YOU IF YOU EVER SOME BACK!!

Three Friends: #run away screaming#

FM: #triumphant smile#

Door: Yay! Now they'll never return! WOO HOO!

Door: Ding Dong!

FM: Ahh! The door's not even closed yet!

Door: Ding Dong! I know! Would you like some iced tea? Ding Dong!

FM: -- no… #closes the door# Kagome! Your door's malfunctioning!

Door: Ding Dong! Help- Ding Dong! Me- Ding Dong! Kagome!

Kagome: #sighs# What did my friends do to the door this time? #walks out to find a solution#

KP: #stops drinking from an empty gallon of milk# Aw… it's all gone…

FM: Was that thing full?!

KP: Yeah, but that was like, a whole minute ago! #whimpers and looks for more milk#

FM: Sad, sad obsessions KP.

KP: You're one to talk about obsessing.

FM: What's that supposed to mean?

KP: Look! Sesshomaru's running down the street! #points out the window#

FM: #eyes widen, looks out the window and then blindly breaks through it# WAIT FOR ME FLUFFY-SAMA!! #goes tearing down the street#

KP: My point has been made. #looks around# Milk… #continues searching for the beloved milk#

------ In The Later Time ------

Door: Ding Dong!

KP: #throws a toothbrush that suddenly appeared in her hand at the door# Shut up! I thought Kagome fixed you!

Door: She did! Someone's here!

Voice 1: Open up Kagome!

Voice 2: We're here!

KP: #opens door to find Miroku and Sango. Miroku is wearing a party hat and is holding a case of beer# Hello Friends! Hello Beer! #takes the beer away and hides it#

Sango: …

Miroku: … mmm, feisty….

Kagome: #suddenly appears in the room# Hey guys!

Sango: …

Miroku: …I assume we shall need more beer…

Kagome: Probably… KaratePenguin hath stolen the beer and we shant ever hear of it again…

Sango: … how do you hear beer?

Kagome: ………….. I don't know.

FM: #walks in the door lonely and heart broken# …It wasn't him…

KP: #re-appears half drunk# Who?

FM: Well, he was riding a dragon and had an obnoxious talking toad with him, so I thought…

KP: Now FM, you have to remember how many people have a dragon and a talking toad these days.

FM: Yeah…

Sango: About who?

KP and FM: Lord Sesshomaru.

Kagome: I know! I have a phone book! He's supposed to be coming, but maybe you can actually get him here!

FM: #super happy sunshine squad eyes# Really??!! #follows her to the phone book#

KP: Sesshomaru… Badomado… Samoshuro… Lammokatu… Picklesomanu…

FM: #found Sesshomaru's address and is on the move to find him, a dreamy look in her eyes, and a heavy dramatic sigh#

Kagome: #watches FM leave# Wow… that was kinda disturbing.

Miroku: Tell me about it. She's gone into complete stalker mode. #sits down and folds his arms, nodding# I taught her well.

Sango: What?!?! 00

------Meanwhile With FluffysMaiden-----

FM: #standing in front of a GINORMOUS mansion# OMG… #knocks on the door and prepares to attack#

Sesshy: #opens the door# Go away- #suddenly is knocked over by FM jumping onto him#

FM: #practically in tears# OMG! OMG! OMG! IT REALLY IS YOU! OMG! #hugs Sesshy tightly around the waist#

Sesshy: #stands up abruptly and attempts to pry FM off himself# Get off human!

FM: NEVER! I WILL NEVER LET GO FLUFFY-SAMA! I DON'T THINK I CAN SURVIVE ANOTHER HEARTBREAK! #hugs him even tighter#

Sesshy: #confused# What the hell are you talking about? #miraculously manages to get FM off him#

FM: #stands up# You are the one I truly love Fluffy-sama. #blush# (SPARKLY MOMENTS!!) (weeee)

Sesshy: #sweat drop#

FM: #moves closer in an attempt to kiss him#

Sesshy: OK THAT'S ENOUGH!! You need to leave! Now! #points out the door#

FM: Fine. #starts to walk out and grabs the back of his kimono and drags him out of his house#

Sesshy: Let go of me! #struggle#

FM: You're coming with me whether you want to or not. #locks his house door and devours the key#

Sesshy: Oh no I'm not! #breaks free and begins to run away only to be tripped by FM#

FM: #Begins dragging him by his feet# Oh, I beg to differ Fluffy-sama!

Sesshy: NOO!!!! #digs his claws into the pavement in attempts to stop FM#

FM: #continues to drag Sesshy despite his effort#

------End of Chapter------

KP: Yeah, so the first chapter is kinda wierd. But please review! It shall get better, and more people shall come!

FM: Yes, and... more drunkenness! (so review!)


	2. And Yet It Continues

-----The House In Insanity: A Few Moments Later-----

Door: Ding Dong!

Sango: Who is it?

Voice: Me!

Sango: #walks to the door and finds Rin, pulling Ah-Un, Jaken, and Shippo in a small green wagon.# (Very small) Uh, yes?

Rin: Would you be interested in having your very own dragon? They are very popular these days, as you know. And what would a dragon be without an annoying talking toad by his side! Now at a special price! And, for a special bonus, I'll throw in your own little kitsune for free!

Shippo: #struggles in bonds, looking hurt#

Sango: Ah, why don't you just come in? We're having a party, and it would be wonderful if you and your cheap comrades would join us!

Rin: #pulls wagon inside# Why yes, we'd be delighted! #starts untying them#

Door: Ding Dong!

Sango: The door isn't closed yet!

Door: Oh yeah! #closes# Ding Dong! Someone's here! #opens#

FM: #charges in, pulling Sesshomaru by his feet# Ah, we've made it!

KP: Badadomado… oh hey FluffysMaiden! You found him! …He's here! … #glares at Sesshomaru and gets an inch away from his face# WHERE'S INUYASHA???

Sesshy: GET AWAY FROM ME YOU FREAKS!!

FM: Excuse me… #takes the binds from Rin's cheap comrades and begins to tie up Sesshomaru# Ah, much better…

cha cha music starts and in come Naraku, Kouga, Kilala, and Kikyo in a mambo line

Everyone not in the Mambo Line: --;; or ??

Kouga: Hey you! What is up all ya homie G dawgs? #jumps to Kagome# And you my sweet margarita!

KP: WHERE'S THE MARGARITAS?!

Naraku: Right here! #holds up a box that says "Margarita Maker 4000"#

KP: Gimme! #pounces and punches him in the face for no apparent reason, and then disappears into the kitchen#

Naraku: Ow! That hurt! #starts crying, reaching out hoping someone will hold him#

Shippo: #stands next to him and shakes his head# Oh come on, I don't even do that! #stubs his toe on a piece of broccoli that appears mysteriously and falls down, starting to cry with Naraku in the middle of the floor. Mysteriously, the broccoli vanishes#

Kilala: #snuggles up to Shippo# purrr….

Rin: #yanks Kilala away from him# Bad Kitty! He's mine! #she and Kilala get into a "cat fight"#

Door: Ding Dong!

Naraku: #scared out of his mind, still bawling. The door is about to give him iced tea, then decides against it#

Kikyo: Fine. I'll answer the door. (nobody cares) #opens the door#

…

Inuyasha?

KP: #appears from behind Kikyo in a chef hat and an apron# Where?!?!?! #turns her head#

Inu: Right here dufus!

KP: #stares **SUPER HAPPY SUNSHINE SQUAD** eyes# Inuyasha… You called me a dufus! I'm so happy! Kikyo, did he call you a dufus? #before she can answer# No! He didn't! Only me! I feel special… #grabs his arm and disappears with him into the kitchen#

FM: They need adult supervision in there. Any volunteers? #looks around to see no one# Okay, #throws Rin into the kitchen# Go supervise.

Kikyo: Rin isn't an adult.

FM: **NO ONE CARES!** grr #throws Kikyo out the window into a sudden tornado which is suddenly a flash flood and then it transforms into a tsunami which takes her half way around the world and back. Then randomly she is struck by lightning on a clear sunny day (no one cares) She arrives back at the house all crispy and smells like bacon#

Kilala: #takes a bit out of Kikyo because she thinks she's bacon# Crunch crunch… meow! #eats the rest of her but then gets sick and throws up on Jaken. (No one cares)#

Sesshy: About time someone did that…

FM: Shh! #covers mouth# Don't speak my Fluffy-kun.

Sesshy: #sweat drop# 00;;

Kagome: Hey, has Inuyasha arrived yet? #receives blank stares# Well, has he?

Sesshy: #imagines Kagome with a bubble for a head#

Kouga: Not yet my darling, but wants him here anyways? #advances# I'm all you need, and you're all I need.

Kagome: I am? #bubble-headedness#

Door: Ding Dong!

Ah-Un: #opens the door#

Ayame: #flies past Ah-Un and hugs Kouga intensely# My love! I've come for you! Hold me in your arms and never let go!

Kagome: Wait! Who's she?

Kouga: I … uh… don't know…

Ayame: #brushes his hair back# Of course you do Kouga-kun! We're going to be married!

Kagome: #tears in her eyes# I thought I was all you needed! #runs away#

------ Drunk: Our Story------

Sesshy: Does anyone find it weird that I'm tied up? #struggles#

FM: Awww poor puppy… #drunk and walking towards him# Does the puppy want out?

Sesshy: #big puppy dog eyes#

FM: #overwhelmed by the adorableness of Sesshy# Okay puppy wuppy. Only if you promise not to run away!

Sesshy: #nods eagerly#

FM: #unties Sesshy# There you go puppy wuppy! #pets# Sesshy Are we all better now?

Sesshy: ….

FM: #gasps# You didn't run away!

Sesshy: ….

FM: #turns away from Sesshy#

Sesshy: #worried# Hey… are you okay?

FM: #whirls around and jumps onto Sesshy# NOW WE CAN HAVE A TEA PARTY! WOOOO HOOOO!!!!

Sesshy: #knocked over#

FM: And we can play dress up and get our nails done and go shopping! #happy schoolgirl squeal# And then we can go to the mall and do it all over again! #grabs Sesshy and heads out the door#

Kagura: #drunk# You ain't goin nowhere #steps (actually wobbles) in front of the door#

FM: Fluffy-kun and I are going shopping! #gets up in Kagura's face# Move Biotch!

Kagura: Fluffy is mine! #slaps FM#

FM: Grrrrr… turns to Sesshy Fluffy-kun…. sick her boy!

Sesshy: #growls starts barking at Kagura# Back off of FluffysMaiden witch! #lunges and attacks Kagura, ripping her to shreds#

KP: #comes in with her gallon of Milky margarita beer# Hey! That'll teach you to get in the way of shopping!

Kanna: #stares expressionlessly in the corner#

KP: #walks over# You need to loosen up man! #forces the MMB down her throat#

Kanna: Hmm… tastes of dried peas and sausage…. Yum…. Very satisfying…#jumps out the window and then hops on the roof and begins to sing Barney songs#

KP: Yay! #goes outside and sings along#

Door: Ding Dong!

KP: I love you!

Door: Ding Dong! Someone else is here!

Miroku: Ooo! I hope it's a lady!

Sango: #big sad puppy dog eyes# What about me?

Miroku: Oh yeah… #thinks to himself# …I hope it's a lady… #opens the door and screams like a girl#

Hojo: …um…hello…is Kagome home?

Kagome: #comes to the door, completely drunk# Oh, hello Hojo-kun! I've missed you so much! #jumps into his arms and starts singing# la la la…lets go to my bedroom, shall we?

Hojo:# huge grin# And away we go! #races into the bedroom and shuts the door#

------ If You Didn't Think We Were Insane Before------

Ayame: #downs more margaritas# Oooooh look a kitty! #runs to Kilala and cuddles her# KITTY!

Kilala: MOEW! #oxygen is being cut off from the immense cuddling and is turning blue#

Sango: No Kilala! #smacks Ayame with boomerang#

Kilala: #transforms to bigger cat form# ROAR! #pins Ayame to the ground#

Kouga: #jumps to save Ayame but lands on Sango# I will save you my potato! #slurring words#

Miroku: #whacks Kouga with staff# Sango is my potato you fool!

Kilala: #suddenly runs around in circles then de-transforms and continues running in circles#

Ayame: WEEEE!! #runs around in circles too but runs into a wall and is knocked out#

Inu: #looks at the ceiling# I think I'm going up to KP… woooo! #jumps through the ceiling onto the roof#

Naraku: Babooooooon! Babooooooon! #twirls around like a ballerina# I wish I was a Babooooooooooooooo #windows break# ooooooooooooo #ground begins to shake# oooooon!

everything and everyone stops

Naraku: #about to sing again but is bonked on the head by a tiny piece of ceiling# Owie! #begins sobbing #I gotsa boo boo! WAAAAAAH!

Shippo: #from inside the closet# I love to jump up and down! Do da! Do da! I love to jump up and down! Oh da do da day!

FM: #clinging to Sesshy# Never leave me Fluffy-kun! #cuddles# I love you like a moose.

Sesshy: A moose….?

FM: #reaches up and strokes his silver hair# Yes my moosey love. We will eventually have a box, but for now we have the MARGARITAS!! #runs into the kitchen dragging Sesshy with her just then Kanna, KP, and Inuyasha fall through the ceiling singing My Band by Eminem#

Rin: #jumps out of the closet heroically# Wow, look at that sky! I see a cloud that looks just like Shippo's-

Shippo: #jumps out and covers her mouth with his hand# They mustn't know! That was our special moment; let us not stain it with others and thier evil ways.

Rin: In fact! Let's! Do it! Again! #hops heroically back in the closet with Shippo#

Door: Ding Dong! Ding Dong! #gets faster and more frantic# Ding-Ding-Ding-Ding-Ding- #explodes#

KP: #crawls over to the exploded door# NO! All those times we spent together! All those precious moments that shall remain in my heart forever! But…why?!! #starts sobbing uncontrollably#

Myoga: #stands outside the fallen doorframe and looks around# You're all drunk, aren't you?

KP: #holds a piece of the door that's still smoldering# … WHY??!…

Inu: Oh my dear KaratePenguin! I made you pancakes, see? #shows her a stack of pancakes#

KP: #one last long sob# With this door piece, and theses pancakes, I shall be happy once more! #eats door piece and pancakes#

------ If You Ever Had Any Doubt------

Sesshy: I'm pretty much the only one who's sober here. #once again jumped on by FM#

Inu: #forces beer and margaritas down Sesshomaru's throat# Now Sesshomaru, lets be good brothers and drink 'till we pass out!

Sesshy: #stands up all swaying and dizzy like# Why yes Inuyasha… I would love another crème puff…. With extra crème and no puff! Woooo! #spins around#

Inu: #spins around and accidentally steps on Myoga# Ewwww…. Now I got Myoga guts on my feet… EEEEEEEEEEK! #screams like a little girl and jumps up and down#

Kanna: #jumps on the table #Have no fear! #shiny heroic background# FOR I AM HERE!!

Inu: EEEEEEEEEEEK! #runs away from Kanna#

KP: frantically Inu-chan! Come back to me! #throws a stick after him#

Inu: #comes back to her feet with the stick in his mouth #Arf! #smiles happily#

KP: #giggles at the cuteness# Ah, my kawaii Inuyasha, will you get in the Margarita Barrel?

Inu: Only for you my darlin! #hops into the Margarita Barrel#

KP: #throws in the shikon jewel# Oh, and by the way, is this okay with everyone? #everyone is drunk, so of course it's okay!# If you say so! #the barrel and Inuyasha begin to glow. Everyone in blinded by the light, and then it suddenly dims. Standing in the barrel is now Demon, Hanyou, and Human Inuyasha# YAY!

Inu: My goodness! What has happened? #he is drunk, the other two are not#

KP: I used the shikon jewel! That, mixed with margaritas, equals 3 Inuyashas!

DI: #growls#

HI: What….?

KP: #smiles innocently#

Inu: Well, alrighty then!

KP: I get dibs on Hanyou Inuyasha! #clings to Inu#

DI: #out of nowhere# DIE!! #bounces around and kills Naraku and Jaken. Hojo comes out completely sober, so Demon Inuyasha kills him too#

Kagome: Oh no! You killed Hojo! #sees Human Inuyasha# Yay! #pulls him into the bedroom against his will#

Fan girls: #comes running through the exploded door# OMG! It's Demon Inuyasha! #grab him and take him away#

Shippo: #from inside the closet# Who will survive? Demon Inuyasha, or the Fan girls?

HI: #comes running down the stairs# OMG… she tried to-

FM: WE DON'T NEED TO KNOW!

KP: #rebuilds the door while holding onto Inu# It is complete… minus one piece… it was a good piece… I knew it well… #nods#

Door: I LIVE ONCE AGAIN! Ding Dong! Ding Dong! #frantically repeats#

Ah-Un: I think the doors broken again…

Everyone: You're still here?!?!

KP: We forgot you were even here.

Ah-Un: Yeah, that happens a lot.

Door: #still frantically# Ding Dong! #repeats#

Kagome:# from upstairs# WILL SOMEONE ANSWER THE DOOR!? Oh and give my Inuyasha back!

Shippo: #answers the door#

DI: #runs in the house with a terrified expression# Never again am I going outside…. Never… never… never… #slams door shut#

Door: Owww…

Sesshy: Now they're all here! WEEEEEEE!! They gotsa drink the barrel now!

HI Inu DI: OK!! #big smiles# #the barrel and its contents have disappeared#

Inu: Hey! I got an idea!

HI: Really? I do to!

DI: #giddy schoolgirl squeal# like OMG so do I! #giggle#

HI Inu DI: LETS DO THE CAN CAN! #stand in a line and does the Can Can#

KP: #cheers loudly like a groupie# I LOVE YOU ALL!!! #sees a can of soup floating in mid air# Ooo! #grabs can of soup and heads to the kitchen# My new love!

Inu: #stops can canning and watches her leave# …What about me? #thinking# I_ shall get that can of soup for taking my KaratePenguin away from me! Then I shall take her and make her mine, so then no one may take her away form me again!_ #follows them into the kitchen#

Door: Ding D- #is run over and trampled by Kaede riding a humongously fat pig#

Kaede: Yee-haw! Let's go Pickles!

Pickles: #oinks and runs through the kitchen and smashes through the wall#

Sesshy: What the…

Fan girls: #suddenly come through the trampled door in a huge mob, chasing the pig# WE LOVE YOU PICKLES!!! #follows them through the now no-existing wall#

FM: Piggy! Run for your life! RUN PIGGY RUN!


End file.
